


Nature Kinks

by riot3672



Series: Stupid Avengers Camping Adventures [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Camping, Characters Reading Fanfiction, F/M, Literal Sleeping Together, Mild Smut, Outdoor Sex, Sexual Humor, Sharing a Sleeping Bag, Sibling Incest, Twincest, Wilderness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-18
Updated: 2015-08-18
Packaged: 2018-04-15 07:40:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4598451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riot3672/pseuds/riot3672
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve decides to take the Avengers camping to work on some off-kilter field training, but no one did a great job of packing. By the end of the first night, Pietro, Wanda, Clint, and Natasha are sharing a two-person tent, Pietro and Wanda are sharing a one-person sleeping bag, and all the tent inhabitants are sharing the bad wilderness erotica Pietro found on the internet. As the night wears on with no sleep and even less hope, Steve's little training trip goes far off course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nature Kinks

“Bad news, guys.”

Now, this would’ve been bad enough given that it was Tony Stark saying it. It got bumped up to a whole level above horrible considering he said it early evening on the first night of the Avengers camping trip.

“Come on, Tony, stop being overdramatic,” Natasha said.

Pietro gave Natasha props. He would’ve said something, but someone had given him a banana boat, and there were far more important things to do than snark. 

Tony kept the overdramatic face on for about five more seconds before rolling his eyes and slouching forward. “We don’t have enough sleeping bags.”

Clint crossed his arms. “That’s it? That kind of dramatic cue should be reserved for at least all our food being gone.” Clint glanced back, but Pietro couldn’t tell if he was looking at him or Wanda. “Wouldn’t be surprising considering Road Runner over here.”

“You don’t like how much I eat? Go bitch to Strucker,” Pietro muttered as Wanda handed him her unfinished banana boat.

“Let’s just be honest. If we lose all our food, it’ll be because someone didn’t secure it to the tree like they were supposed to,” Rhodey joked.

Steve scowled. “I’m a _soldier_. I think I know how to secure a bag to a tree.”

“Did you factor me in?” Vision asked, veering everyone back on topic. 

Tony nodded. “Even without you, we’re still down one.” Tony scanned the crowd. “So, who’s gonna volunteer? Steve and Bucky, perhaps?”

Everyone shared a little snigger at their expense, and they did that awkward fidgeting eye contact thing before glaring at Tony. 

“Just have the two smallest people sleep in the same bag,” Clint said.

“So…Nat and Tony?” Pietro said.

Tony shot Pietro a dirty look. “Nat and Wanda.”

A few of the guys snickered.

“Hope you saved room, Wanda,” Natasha said, flashing a v. 

Wanda dipped her index finger into the banana boat she’d gifted Pietro and licked it off her own v. 

“But really,” Natasha said. “You can’t just make this a lesson in seniority?”

“Then who gets to sleep together? The twins?” Steve said.

“Yeah,” Natasha said. “You know, since they sleep in the same bed anyway.”

Pietro was officially interested in the conversation. “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Just because we sleep in the same king sized bed at home doesn’t mean we can sleep in the same sleeping bag. I’d crush her.” He glanced at Wanda. “Or at least kick her or something.”

“Honestly,” Wanda added. “he vibrates and thrashes all night. He needs his own _tent_ , let alone his own _sleeping bag_.”

Tony shrugged. “I don’t know, you guys _did_ share a womb for nine months…”

Pietro didn’t even have the energy to deliver his womb-related incest joke.

“How about this? You two can have the biggest sleeping bag we have,” Tony said.

Wanda gave Tony a look. “That wasn’t the original plan?”

Steve clapped his hands together. “So we brought a two-person tent and a six-person tent. I think, to be nice to the twins for agreeing to sleep in the same sleeping bag, we should give them the two-person tent.”

“So we’re going to put me, you, Bucky, Sam, Rhodey, Thor, Clint, and Nat into an six-person tent?” Tony asked. 

“Aren’t Natasha and Clint friends with the twins?” Thor asked. “Just put them together. They’re all small enough.”

In all honesty, that didn’t sound horrible.

Pietro turned to Clint. “Hey Clint, so for our foursome, I'm thinking Wanda sits on my face, Natasha rides me, they can make out, and you can watch."

"I was thinking something more along the lines of a train--you in back but spooning Wanda, then Wanda and Natasha go at it," Clint replied.

Steve looked around. “Can someone please start telling ghost stories?”

#

For a while, Pietro almost convinced himself that Tony was kidding about the sleeping bag thing, but sure enough, upon entering the two-person tent, there were only three sleeping bags laid down. 

They all changed into their sleeping gear in relative silence, no one really looking at one another. He seriously considered slipping into the hoodie Wanda stole from him to keep extra warm as she put it on, but managed to resist. 

Pietro picked up the sleeping bag and unzipped it length-wise. 

“You ready?” Pietro asked his sister. 

She nodded. “Are you?” He nodded. “Brushed your teeth, got your snacks within reach, comfortable clothes, already peed?”

“I’m good. Ditto?”

“Ditto.”

They exchanged a long look in which they were either telling each other godspeed or that all this anticipation for sleeping in a tent was stupid. Not that he knew; Wanda was the mind-reader. 

He stepped into the sleeping bag first, steadied himself within the material, and opened the flap up for Wanda to get in too. Around the moment that he zipped them both into it, Wanda standing in front of him but pressed fabric against fabric to him, he realized they should’ve gotten in on the floor. He tried to bend his knees and lower them to the floor, but lost his balance and landed on his ass, Wanda knocking into him skull to face. 

“That was so pathetic I can’t even laugh,” Clint commented as Pietro and Wanda groaned.

Wanda shifted over onto her side, and he did the same, facing her. 

At least it was warm.

He pulled their pillow closer to them, waited for Wanda to get comfortable, and laid his head down. 

“See? This isn’t so bad,” Pietro said.

“Wait five minutes,” Clint replied.

He managed to go about three before he felt an unbearable need to shift positions. He tried shifting to his other side, but got the fabric of the sleeping bag wrapped around his leg, tightening Wanda’s end to that of a snake. Or, that’s what Pietro could guess based on how much Wanda thrashed to get out. He shifted to fix the snag, and kept shifting.

Also, he wasn’t tired.

Now lying on his back with Wanda straddling his right leg, Pietro looked to Clint. With all of them set up in a neat little line, Pietro couldn’t help but feel like he was sleeping in the same bed as all of them, not just Wanda. Clint seemed to be ignoring him and Wanda well, his eyes on some paperback with a little reading light attached to it. Natasha was slightly visible from the glow of Clint’s reading light, lying down but eyes open, looking around the tent.

“Hey Wanda?” Pietro said.

Clint and Natasha looked to him as well.

“What?” Wanda muttered back.

“Are you tired yet?”

There was a pause. “Why?”

She could read minds; right. Was her not automatically saying no a sign to go ahead?

“Because I found the most situation appropriate story off that lit porn site you showed me the other day.”

Clint lowered his book so slowly it was like he was performing in a play. Natasha sat up.

“What porn site? I don’t watch porn,” Wanda answered. “The only porn I’ve ever seen is that stupid _Kick-Ass_ parody you found online.”

“No, that…” he pulled out his phone, the story already in its own browser window, “literotica. Anyway, I found this while avoiding Steve today. It’s some mother nature bullshit with siblings sharing a sleeping bag. You know how you wanted to know what incest kink erotica is? It’s this.”

“Why would you ever ask to see that?” Clint asked Wanda.

“I didn’t. I was reading a book where an incestuous relationship actually had some detailed sex scenes, and Pietro stole the book and said I could find steamier material from ‘incest kink erotica.’”

Another pause.

“What’re you waiting for?” Natasha asked. Pietro furrowed his brow. “Aren’t you going to read your bad internet nature porn?”

“Do you want me to?” 

Natasha rolled her eyes. “It’s not like any of us are going to get comfortable enough to sleep.” 

Pietro looked down at his phone and began to read. “‘My parents were born a few decades early.’”

“Holy shit, is this full family?” Clint interjected.

“I’ve never read this before, so let’s find out,” Pietro replied. “ ‘You know, the type of people who would’ve been those hippies from the musical _Hair_ back in the 1960s.” There was actually an annoying amount of exposition detailing the campsite and some weather report making everything cold and the mom telling the kids to share a sleeping bag since one got stolen by a bear. Then, the good stuff started happening. “‘And then, it happened. Me and Mary pressed tit to man-tit, and we hear a low moan from the other tent. The moan is soon joined by a squeal of laughter. A cacophony of pleasure, all thanks to Mom and Dad. I’m not sure if I should look at Mary or not. If I make a comment, will she laugh or disown us?’” Pietro put on his best American accent, “‘‘Looks like things are heating up in there,’ I finally spit out. ‘Guess Mom doesn’t need her Hawaiian vacation to see a volcano erupt,’ Mary replied.’”

“What the _fuck_ is this?” Clint interrupted.

“Shh,” Natasha said, putting a hand over Clint's mouth. 

Pietro continued. “‘Now we can even hear Mom and Dad’s dirty talk. ‘Fuck me harder, Joe,’ Mom shouts, ‘God, God, like that. Please, yes, get that big, juicy cock all in. Stretch me to your eight inches.’ I make eye contact with Mary, and she smirks. ‘Damn, Mom’s volcano is sure erupting tonight. Kinda jealous.’ She pauses. ‘Did Dad give you the goods?’ Mary asks. Holy shit.’”

“Holy shit why are you still reading this?” Wanda commented.

Pietro picked up his pillow and pushed it into Wanda’s face, and let her throw it right off. “‘There’s no denying it now. I’m hard as a fucking rock, and Mary’s looking at me like an eager porn star. I grin. ‘Wanna find out?’ We shed our clothes between moans and cries from our parents. God, I’ve seen Mary’s body before, but seeing her like this, I’m wishing I had paid more attention when glimpsing her after the shower. The next thing I know, Mary’s sliding deeper into the sleeping bag, and then my cock is engulfed in her warm, velvet smooth mouth. I groan load enough to wake the bears, and take a dip into her tropical island, searching for that neglected volcano.’”

“Eww,” Wanda said.

Pietro turned to Wanda. “What?”

“They’ve been _camping_ and they’re doing a sixty-nine? You fell in bear shit less than an hour after getting here.”

Natasha and Clint laughed. 

“Not my _dick_. Besides, this is about Alan and Mary, and they didn’t fall in shit. And if they did, they probably washed it off.”

“In the river. With dysentery.”

“ _Anyway_ , ‘I tried to coax as many sounds out of my sister as my dad was getting from my mom, but Mary isn’t about to lose this game. I suck her labia into my mouth and she deep throated me, swallowed me down in one bite.’”

“So this story has been using stupid metaphors and then they just drop labia?” Clint said. “Why not just call them volcano rims?”

Natasha put a hand on Clint’s shoulder. “Clint, I think this story is trying to imply that the sister has huge lips. They stop looking like lips at that point.”

“Then what do they look like?”

“A waddle.”

Pietro shrugged. “‘As I feel my own lava brewing at the edge, Mary loses it, her volcano erupting with force, coating my mouth in her sweet, sweet lava. I spill into her right after. She climbs out of the sleeping bag and smashes her lips against mine, mingling our juices together. And fuck, it’s the best combination I’ve tasted in years.’”

“How did she not suffocate?” Wanda asked.

Pietro gave her a look. “Wanda, you can’t scrutinize this. They’ve been calling each other’s fun bits volcanos for four pages and it keeps switching tense.” He looked back to the story. “‘Wrapping Mary’s tongue in mine makes my refractory period disappear, my member right back up, ready to mingle some volcanos. My mind’s racing, ‘sister’ and ‘fuck’ suddenly two words that I need together. I plunge into her, tip to base snug with one thrust. She gasps and tightens her thighs around me. ‘Fuck me, big brother,’ she says. ‘Fuck me so hard Mom’ll be jealous. God, fill my oven with your loaf.’ She shifts under me, allowing me to penetrate even deeper. She loses it, moaning, sighing, crying out jumbled requests, saying, ‘Harder, Alan, harder, big brother.’ Then, God, she’s wet. Wet as the fucking river we’re camped next to, warm like the inside of a volcano. ‘You know, Alan,’ she whispers to me, ‘I could never get off, not for years. Then, one day, I saw a glimpse of you naked as you left the shower for me. You left the shower hot for me, and I couldn’t get your image out of my head. So, I kept it there, and touched myself, and that was it. I came so hard it could’ve registered on the Richter scale.’ That was it. Her cavern hot and slick around my meat, I came, shuddering and filling her with my seed. Fuck, I thought. I just fucked my sister. And it was worth it. Dear God, it was worth it. ‘You think Mom’s jealous?’ I ask Mary. She grins. ‘She’d be crazy not to be.’”

There was a moment where the only sounds coming through were Clint and Natasha laughing. Pietro looked to Wanda, who couldn’t have looked less impressed.

“The Kick-Ass porn parody was better than that,” Wanda commented.

Without any new stories to load, everyone tried to go to bed.

Of course, he never really managed. If he fell into a deep sleep, he’d wake up to Wanda shooting him with hexes because he accidentally suffocated her, or the ground was too hard or he was squished trying not to bother Wanda. Then, just when he was prepared to try to sleep again, someone started snoring so loud from somewhere around him that Pietro wasn’t so sure it wasn’t a car engine. 

“Status update: it’s one am,” Clint said, his voice deflated. “Natasha?”

“Never fell asleep,” Natasha answered.

“Pietro?”

“Wide awake,” Pietro replied.

“Wanda?”

Wanda replied with a groan and some unintelligible muttering. 

“Who the hell even is that?” Pietro asked.

“Thor,” Clint said.

“Shit. We can’t kill him.”

“You could probably rip out his vocal cords,” Natasha offered.

“And who would do that?” Clint asked.

Silence.

#

The coffee and pancakes were in no way sufficient waker-uppers for what Steve had planned for that day. Field mission at eight am. Barely enough time to drag durable clothing on before Steve sent him and Wanda off to find something. 

“Can I be completely honest? I didn’t listen to what Steve wanted us to do,” Pietro said as he leaned against the nearest tree.

Wanda scanned the area. “He said something about holding our positions. He’d get in touch.” Her eyes settled on something. “Steve marked the spot. At least we’re in the right place.”

She joined him in leaning against the trees. “Wanna get into the wrong place?”

She grinned. “Will it wake me up?”

“I could certainly try.”

“Brought a condom?” He pulled one out of his pocket and smiled right back. “Blanket?”

Nope. “Hold on.”

Working at his highest speed, Pietro rushed back to the campsite, grabbed a blanket, and sped back. He kicked some rocks and sticks away, laid out the blanket, and pulled Wanda to the forest floor.

He flipped on top of her when they reached the ground, lips meeting in a first slow and tender kiss. She tasted like chapstick, more mild than her lipstick he’d always manage to kiss off. It was kind of nice. 

He kissed her slowly, exploring every corner of her mouth, eager for her little sighs of encouragement. There was something about being with Wanda in the morning that he loved—a bit of cold in the air that forced them closer, the way she’d taste like coffee, how he felt like they were the only people in the world. Although, honestly, he might just be so tired that he was hallucinating enjoying something slow.

Wanda was still shivering even with Pietro’s hoodie, and Pietro took it as a new challenge to get to her skin without freezing her. He slid one hand up the bottom of the hoodie and shirt underneath, and thought about the best way to eventually go about getting at her lady bits. 

His thoughts shot far off target when he wrapped his hand around her breast. Little rascal had forgone a bra that morning. He grinned as he gave her a good squeeze.

“Already knew you were beautiful in anything you wore, but sexy too? You’re too much,” he whispered in her ear.

She smiled, blush even more present against her pale skin than usual. “You uh, just reminded me.”

He laughed and kissed her neck. She gasped. “Still.”

So, maybe he hadn’t caused her hard nipples, but he sure had caused the rest—goosebumps down her navel, the spot of wetness growing on the seat of her underwear. 

“Ready?” he asked between kisses.

“Yeah. Just know if you say the word ‘volcano’ we’re done.”

He chuckled as he unwrapped the condom and suited up. He really hoped Wanda was wound tight because she’d be pretty exposed for this. He supposed they could just do that CAT position instead of missionary, that usually worked. 

Freezing his dick off, he helped Wanda get her jeans and underwear out of the way and plunged right in. Then, God, he appreciated her pussy as much as any man should, but her warmth was a particular plus that morning. 

“Still good?” he asked as he took her hand in his.

“Yeah, just cold.”

He wrapped the blanket around her and got back to work. He shifted up and trapped her legs between his, savoring the little “mmm” sound Wanda made. She pulled him down for a kiss, and he started thrusting. 

Pietro didn’t know why, but he found himself keeping his eyes closed for much longer than he expected. Somehow, it made everything sharper—the bursts of pleasure as lips met skin, the tastes of Wanda’s skin, even the air he inhaled, so much crisper than anything in the city. 

Wanda was just being a little quiet. It wasn’t that odd—she’d never been particularly vocal in bed. No, what really confused him was that not only was Wanda quiet, but she hadn’t connected her minds. 

“Wanda?”

No answer. He stopped thrusting and scrambled to meet her eyes.

Hers were closed. And not in a pleasure way, in an asleep way.

“Wanda?”

Shit, what was he supposed to do? Poke her awake and try to finish or…?

He frowned as he watched her chest rise and fall, her features more peaceful than she’d been the entire trip. It’d be cruel to wake her considering he was the one who kept her up all night. 

Dejected but not about to pull anything weird, Pietro pulled out and pulled her pants and underwear back on. 

He glanced at Wanda as he used his hand to finish the job. He’d probably have to tell her about it, but at least no one else would know that his lover fell asleep during sex. There was no way to make that positive. And hey, he’d had a more sexy lovemaking session than that stupid volcano hippy brother-sister-remote mom and dad erotic story.

Once he’d finished, he tossed the condom into a granola bar wrapper he found in his pocket and waited. The forest was kind of peaceful for being a place of stupid and arduous training. He just needed to…

“Pietro!”

Pietro startled awake, only to find Clint and Natasha.

“What?” Pietro replied.

“Steve has a search party out for you two.” He glanced at Natasha. “I think we get a reward for finding them.”

Pietro glanced at his watch. “It’s fifteen minutes past the time Steve wanted us to convene.”

“Preaching to the choir,” Natasha said. She looked to Wanda, who was just waking up. “You wanna just share the sleeping bag tonight? I don’t move.”

Wanda nodded as she rubbed her eyes. “Sure.”

Pietro helped Wanda to her feet, and they all started the hike back to the campsite.

“Also, did you guys rush off just to sleep? Thought you two were too punk-y for that,” Clint said.

“Want a granola bar?” Pietro replied.

He left the wrapper in Clint’s hands and quickened his pace.

There was nothing better than Clint’s shriek when he figured it out.

 


End file.
